Purpose & Pain
Once upon a time, a fairytale began its tender thread,
A story that led me to dreams where wishes were widespread.
Put me so high on a pedestal believing that was the real you.
Followed by a wake-up call that woke me from my dream
you never really cared you were rather mean.
If I was the answer to your prayers or manifestation of your dreams
Shouldn’t I then have been treated like a queen?
You said you feel like you have won the lottery
Within your world, you swore, all you ever needed was me.
You shattered every dream, then abused and discarded me
Every day you pledged to change and mend your ways
Like every other promise that you made in vain
Saying sorry was just a five-letter word” formality
Even animals have faith and show some loyalty
Empathy, your missing piece, it seems, from birth erased,
No love, no respect, in your heart's hollow space.
Soon I had lost in you every ounce of trust.
shame guilt or remorse in your heart, I never felt.
Warisa Zainab Hussain, my name stands strong!
Defying tyranny, and oppression, in the face of wrong.
Like a devil disguised as a human soul
You were simply a predator looking for your prey
To bend, to mold, to enslave and suppress,
Within your twisted grasp, you sought to possess.
But hope persisted, prayers for better days to unfold,
Yet darkness deepened, dreams turned bitter, cold.
I saw myself disappearing right before my eyes,
As you revealed behind closed doors your malevolent ways
A dual-faced phantom, a performance to astound,
A mask before the world, a pretence so profound.
Your act in front of the world surely deserves an Oscar.
With everyone else you were always so kind, friendly, and sober.
Divine in the public eye, a humanitarian's facade,
Behind it, a narcissistic beast, mercilessly clawed.
Believing none would see, none would know your deceit,
But Allah, the eternal Witness, sees through the false beat
He, the Judge, the knower of all hearts' hidden grudges,
As injustice thrived, I waited for heaven's nudge.
With faith in Allah's mercy, certainty my guide,
Belief in the unseen, miracles do often bide.
with tawakkal in Allah’s mercy and having yaqeen
miracles happen when you believe in the unseen.
he sends blessings often disguised as calamities
he tests the ones he loves with fear and anxieties.
For he is the al Rehman and Al Raheem
No soul abandoned, nor pushed to an extreme.
In this world, purpose is grander than the eye can see,
Life's tapestry woven with faith, struggle, and glee.
Some Days in your favour, while others challenge and oppose,
Within your soul, the nafs, true strength truly grows.
A believer, a lover of the Ahlulbayt's light,
I questioned my fate in this interminable night.
Why surrender, and abandon hope, in this abyss of despair?
Within the walls of "home," suffering in silence doesn’t repair.
I was never your slave, your ego's twisted goal,
The world spins not to orbit around your role.
A purpose higher, beyond your selfish creed,
My master, my creator, is beyond your cruel greed.
Allah’s wrath does fall upon the oppressor.
even the skies tremble and mountains crumble
when an innocent is stabbed in the heart with a dagger.
I wasn’t created to please you, dear perpetrator!
A purpose higher I believe I am here
Don’t want to walk on eggshells don’t want to live in fear
Can’t live as a victim with the burden I can’t bear.
So, I starved my fear and fed my faith
breaking all the patterns of this dysfunctional trait.
Thought I would break as I could no longer take it.
The manipulation, the lies those mind games you played.
knowing that you have no power over me,
I broke the cycle and freely walked away.
For generations ahead, I continue to pray.
Time passed by as I continued to heal
It wasn’t an easy journey my Lord! I swear
Your spiteful demeanor, your venomous words,
My self-discovery soared like free birds.
A decade past, my community I aid,
From pain's darkness, resilience was made.
Keep going with courage and bravery.
My intuition says I will find My destiny.
The trust that I once had did get betray.
But guess what strangely there’s not much dismay
Time, they say is a great healer for man
I disagree as it merely rearranges your memory
For hurt and pain, there’s always a remedy.
Injustice, a burden, I'll bear no more,
Healing and purpose, my heart's new core.
Slandered I may be, but truth stands with me,
With therapy's help, I've emerged, I'm free.